Let’s just say that I came a LONG WAY when it comes to comparing myself to others. Comparing ourselves to others is most definitely a struggle that I have ALWAYS had. With this struggle came extreme insecurities which inevitably led me to feel less confident in myself and who I was. Fortunately in recent months, I have been able to overcome a lot of my hardships that came with comparing myself to others. Today, I will be sharing how I stopped comparing myself to others as much, in hopes that I can help one lucky person be on their way to doing the same. I will note that while these tips may have worked for me, they may not work as well for someone else. We ALL have unique journeys to becoming our best selves, and nothing ever works the exact same way for us all <3
Only Stalk Someone’s Social Media Out of Excitement and Admiration
Ahhhh – the good old social media stalking! I think we have ALL been there!!! With social media stalking comes a whole new set of insecurities that can pop up. At the same time, we can easily become super absorbed in what others post that it takes away from how positively we see and view ourselves. I used to CONSTANTLY creep/stalk on other’s profiles and it only made me look down on myself more and more. That being said, it is most definitely beneficial to use that energy that you have been spending looking at others’ profiles somewhere else. For myself, that meant focusing on my blog and its posts a lot more. I also have taken the time to interact with other bloggers and influencers in my niche on my platform, which has only helped me to enjoy what I share to others and NOT what others share on theirs!
At the same time, I have found when it comes to blogging and gathering inspiration, to stalk on profiles of those who I find as an inspiration. For example, other bloggers and influencers who are in my niche. That way, I can feel excited and admire what they have done with their platform and *just maybe* bounce off some ideas to show on my own platform. I do this kind of like a mini Pinterest but Instagram addition, where I list my ideas! Though I will say, it is important not to spend too much time looking at others’ profiles, as it can become a habit that turns into something rather negative. Overall, taking the positive approach to social media stalking will help you in the long run, especially when it comes to comparing yourself to others!
Remember That We ALL Put Our BEST on Social Media!
As the saying goes, “you’re comparing your worst self to someone’s best.” This quote is literally goes without saying. On social media, most of us put our best selves out there. On the flip side, we do not want to share the anger, the hurt, the sadness, and the frustration that we may feel. Every single one of us has our own struggles, however, not many of us put them out there for all to see on our social media platforms. Keeping all of this in mind, we ALL are feeling the same way which is a good reminder for us all.
It Brings Out Our Worst
Typically, when we compare ourselves to others, we look down on ourselves and on our weaknesses while putting someone else’s strengths up on a pedestal. When we do just that, we hurt ourselves in the long run. Why waste that energy on looking down on ourselves? There are 86,400 seconds in each day; use them wisely. It’s better to use our energy towards things that bounce us into our best selves. Have a project that you’ve been working on? Have a show you’ve been binge-watching? Have a recipe you’ve been dying to try? Put your time into the things that bring out the BEST in YOU!
Others Are Comparing Themselves to YOU
When comparing ourselves to others, we often forget that others are often comparing themselves to us. In fact, the same people that we’re comparing ourselves to are the one’s who are comparing us to them. That being said, others may be wishing that they had a strength of our own. For example, you may be a very social person with lots of friends, which someone around you may wish that they had, while you may wish that you had their studious mentality. Knowing that we all typically wish we had something that someone else has, we can realize each other’s strengths and bounce off one another. Going back to my previous example, being a social person can be a strength in the classroom with planning study groups, especially with your friends that may have more of a studious mentality than yourself. Comparing ourselves to others is HARD, but knowing that you’re not alone is always the best thing to keep in mind.
You Cannot Have It All and That is OKAY
THIS was such a hard realization for myself, and I know it is for others too. When turning on the television, it is very easy to look at others and think that they “have it all”. News flash: they don’t and NONE OF US DO! One of my best friends has always said that “you want what you cannot have.” That goes for us all sometime in our lives when comparing ourselves to others with things that they have that we long for. We ALL have our moments of comparing ourselves to others and wishing for things that we do not have. And that is all OKAY.
Focus on What YOU Bring to the Table
Whether we see it or not, each of us brings some unique things to the table. Personally, I find it really important in one’s journey to comparing themselves to others less is to do some deep soul-searching into what your strengths and the great things about you are. Are you a really gifted dancer or writer or even artist? Can you cook a delicious Mac & cheese recipe like no other?! If you do not know what some of your strengths, gifts, are talents are, then ask a close friend or family member. Those in our lives who know us best can point out the best in us, because they love and care about us like we do for them. Whatever it may be, focus on the things that you’re good at and put more of your energy into what you do well. The things that you do well make you YOU! Use them to your advantage.
Only Compare Yourself to Yourself Yesterday
When comparing ourselves, the only person that you should be caring about yourself is to compare yourself to yourself yesterday. Self growth is the key to living out your best life. At the same time, it will help you to compare yourself to only YOU and what YOU can do better for yourself. That being said, focus on YOU and only YOU. When you invest those 86,400 seconds of each day into you, then you will be better off in the long run when it comes to comparing yourself to others less AND to living out your best life.
One of the best investments you can make is in yourself. Working on yourself is such a great way to not only grow as a person but also live out your best life. Doing so with striving to compare yourself to others is an excellent way to do just that! While some of the tips that I mentioned may have worked for me, they may not work for you or someone else and that is OKAY. Many of these tips are also easier said than done, and they TAKE TIME. However, as long as you make an effort to work on yourself, then you’ll be on your way there in no time!
XOXO – Katie <3