Sunday Scaries: Frustration and Uncertainty

These past few weeks, it has hit me more than ever that this upcoming semester will be my last college semester. This Spring 2021 semester will look nothing like I had ever envisioned it to, due to the coronavirus pandemic. Along with ending my college career, there is also so much going on in our world with this week’s terrorist attack at the United States Capitol. Our world is so divided and so uncertain right now that it brings me much frustration, anxiety, and uncertainty.

Last Wednesday’s attack at the Capitol presents how much hate and division there still is in this world and especially in our country. It is an embarrassment to watch this all go down, and these recent events leave me angry, sad, and terrified. People both Democrats and Republicans feel this way. But, the division is sadly still there. As an LGBTQ+ woman, my heart is filled with terror at times for the fact that I worry about going out in public and simply holding hands with my girlfriend. At the same time, I know that black indigenous people of color feel similar ways for simply going out in public. It’s 2021 and NOBODY should feel nervous or ashamed for whatever race, religion, sexuality, gender identity, ethnicity, etc. that they are. We are all human. We all have a place in this world, and we should be embracing who we each are rather than tearing one another down, regardless of our differences.

There is so much uncertainty in our world at this moment. Luckily, the Covid-19 vaccine distribution is in full swing and will continue to be as we transition presidencies. Like everyone else, my Covid-19 fatigue is really starting to get the best of me. It is hard to have to put things on halt for the time being and simply remain still in our ever-changing world. We all want to see our family, friends, coworkers, community members, etc. without having to worry about getting anyone else or ourselves sick. It is hard, and we do not know exactly when we can do things like in the past again, but fortunately it will be coming to an end soon.

Before the coronavirus pandemic drastically changed our way of life, my college life revolved a ton around social activities. I thrive off of social activities, but the pandemic has changed all of that. Even though I still regularly keep in touch and see my friends safely, my ways of doing so have shifted a ton. It has for us all. Back in June 2020, I totally thought that things would be looking a lot better than they are now come January 2021, but my final semester of college will look very different and also be a Covid-19 dominated semester. I most likely will not be able to take my girlfriend to a Spring Formal as my date or walk across a massive stage for graduation without a mask on. As sad and angry that it makes me feel at times, I have to remember that it is that way for a reason. None of us like the implications that thew coronavirus pandemic has brought, but they are there for a reason and that reason is to keep us safe.

Although times are weird and tough at the moment, they WILL get better. Many times, I think about how a few years from now I will be looking back at this time and looking at it as a blur from the past. Masks will not be in sight like they are now. Social distancing protocols will be at a major distance from our minds. Travel will be happening again and at a full swing. We CAN AND WILL be able to do things as before. Things will take some time – we just have to remember to be still and be grateful for what is right in front of us. But, guess what?! The best is yet to come!

XOXO – Katie <3

Leave a Reply