Relationship Sunday’s – Starting Out & Moving While Single

When my Papa graduated from college, he got married and was whisked away into his married life for years to come. That was in the 1960’s. While the 1960’s days are far behind us, many still envision starting their lives out with a significant other by their side. I know of many couples who either get married or are committed upon graduating from college and choose to move in together upon graduating from college. Needless to say, it can be daunting to move and start out on your own as a single person, but it is also empowering.

Personally, I moved from North Carolina to Washington, DC upon graduating from college in the Southern state. I knew that I wanted something different after being in college and living in North Carolina for four years. Before even graduating from college like a few years beforehand, I knew that I wanted to live in Washington, DC and start out there. My mother started out in Washington, DC and tells me about all of her fond memories of her time in the nation’s capital. The same goes for my Dad. Once I found a job opportunity in the Washington, DC area, I knew I had what I needed to achieve my Washington, DC dreams!

When I was in the beginning of my college years, I had always envisioned moving in with a partner that I had met in college, whatever city it may had been. I probably was hoping that I had been able to move to a city beyond Raleigh, too, as I have an adventurous spirit. As time went on, I ended up dating somebody that I thought had the potential to be the one. It was my Senior year of college when I started dating them, and they lived in North Carolina in a different city than my college town and did not want to leave. Many of my connections for post-graduation jobs are in the Washington, DC area where I wanted to and now live. Needless to say, I became very stressed out looking for jobs in a place that I had not wanted to live in, but rather felt pressured to live for the life that I had hoped I would have. During those relationship days, I missed being single and having the freedom to move around without worrying about anyone else. We ended up breaking up after 2 months, and it was one of the best decisions that I had made, especially for my future.

Starting out single was not in my plan for my life. Yet, starting out single was what was best for me, despite me not anticipating it. It can be hard and is hard moving to a brand-new city without a significant other in sight. Some of the challenges with starting out as single and making a move include:

  • The Moving Process – Let’s get this straight: moving can be a challenge. Most specifically, when you’re on your own, it can be difficult to move and move on your own, too. I was fortunate enough to be able to move close to family and have family help with both moving out and moving into my new city. The moving process is daunting – the moving trucks, the moving fees, the heavy lifting, and the packing/unpacking. Even with family help, it took me almost 2 weeks to unpack all of my belongings and fully set everything up in my new place. However, if you are doing it all alone, there is no reason to not utilize help from others. If you’re moving to the Las Vegas area, then Muscle Movers LLC Las Vegas can do all the heavy lifting for you! Not only can they help you move your belongings on move-in day only, they can also help you with packing and unpacking into any type of place, whether it be residential or commercial. At the same time, if you’re living in Las Vegas and moving across the state, to another state, or even overseas, these long-distance movers in Las Vegas can provide ALL of the facilitation regarding your move – find details here.. All in all, Muscle Movers LLC Las Vegas is a great way to allow others to help you with your move, especially if you’re moving on your own as a single lady (or gent!).
  • Lack of Connections – Moving can be a struggle, especially when you do not know a soul in your new town. It can be tough when you do not know anyone beyond your coworkers, apartment mates, or even the mail man. It essentially feels like as if you are a new kid in high school in a new city. But this time, it may be without family and friends. Case in point: if you went to college and lived in a dorm in a place different than your hometown, then you probably didn’t have an established social network when you left. However, for most of us, you developed that social network, academic network, and professional network while in college. You did it during those university days, and you will do it again, but this time, within your brand-new city. You WILL establish a vast social network, grow professionally, and grow personally, too – right in your own new city!
  • Not Having a Go-To Person Nearby – When single, it can be quite difficult to move when you do not have a go-to person right then and there, such as a significant other. There’s a lot of emotions that pop up when moving – stress, excitement, sadness, happiness, etc. It can be nice to be able to go through all those emotions with someone else. At the same time, it’s also nice to be able to have someone right by your side who can go explore and get to know your new town with, too. When single, not having someone who is right then and there to do things with can be difficult. But, on the flip side, when doing things on your own and independently creates confidence and allows you to grow and expand your network in a whole new light than if you were in a relationship. In fact, you may even meet your person while expanding your network while single!

Overall, moving while single can be remarkably challenging, but it has its perks, too. You can meet a bunch of people on your own timeline and have the flexibility to move on your own without worry about anyone else. Nevertheless, you get to expand your network on your own terms and only yours.

XOXO – Katie <3

What The Moving to a New City Transition ACTUALLY Entails!

Moving can be daunting y’all, especially when you have NO CLUE as to what you may be getting into! If you know me, then you know that I currently live in the Washington, DC area after attending college and living in Raleigh, North Carolina for four years. I most definitely called Raleigh home for these past four years, and it always will be. However, I knew that I needed a change in my life in terms of where I lived. So, when the right job opportunity for me popped up in the Washington, DC area, I took a leap of faith and decided to make the big move to the nation’s capital. Once I got here, my preconceived notions were drastically different and that is OKAY. I know that my assumptions about my move were not what they turned out to be and that it is the same for many. That being said, today, I will be breaking down what the moving to a brand-new city transition ACTUALLY entails!

  1. You WILL NOT know people and that is OKAY – Whether you come from a big city or a small town or something of sorts in between, moving to someplace brand-new means that *yes* you are in the newbie in town. I know some people who move to a brand-new place and know only a handful of people or even next to none. On the other hand, I know some folks who have moved to a new city to have their family and some friends there (case in point: myself) or make the move with a significant other and/or their children. Whoever or wherever you are moving to, you will not know everyone in your new area. Even if you are moving to a place that you lived years prior, you probably still won’t know everyone like you did when you left. Cities, towns, and places in general do change over the years – people for the most part are moving in and out of places. So, that being said, there will be lots of new people around and that can be a great thing as it sets the stage for plenty of opportunities to mingle within your own backyard like you may never have before!
  2. Establishment within your community – Going off of the idea of not knowing everyone or enough people to make yourself feel as if you’re apart of your new community, others that are in your community have probably placed down their roots already, even if it’s only been recently. Case in point: when I moved to the Washington, DC area, my family and friends in the area had already established their roots here. That, however, did not mean that they didn’t make time for me. It simply just meant that they already have a footing that is long than my own in this area, which is NORMAL. It WILL take time for you to develop your own footing within your new hometown and that is OKAY. I think of it this way: when I went off to college, it took me and my friends a few months-a year or even more to fully adjust to life there and get a grip on it all. This SAME concept of adjusting to college life goes to life in your new city – it is only normal. Above all else, remember that you WILL thrive in your new city, yet it just may take some time for you to just that!
  3. Things will change in your former city and so may your friend circle – Ah, the dreaded things will change sentiment. *I know, I know*, it may be a challenge to hear this as it is a hard pill to swallow. BUT, as we all know, change is inevitable. It is for all of us. Friend groups change as we move cities, graduate from high school, college, and even switch jobs. Change is bound to happen, and, although we may not enjoy it, it is meant to happen and we must take it with a grain of salt. At times, it can be tough to see your friends and family in your previous hometown simply going about their lives there on the daily, but it is not the end of the world. Your friends and family will have those adjustment periods in their lives, too. In fact, they are 9 times out of 10 adjusting to the fact that you’re not living near them anymore, too. It goes both ways. Above all else, be sure to keep in touch with your friends and family in your own hometown and make time for them, whether it be sending them a letter in the mail, a text message, calling them, or planning a visit to see them. On the same token, you can also use your move as an opportunity to invite your friends and family to come and stay with you, as they will: 1 – have a free place to stay and 2 – be able to check out your new digs!
  4. Lots of alone time – Alone time can be dreadful for some, but it can also be a time of self growth and courage. Being alone was one of my biggest fears in my high school and early college years. However, when I lived by myself my Senior year of college during the COVID-19 pandemic, that fear went away over time and I began to embrace it and actually grow from it all. Depending on where you are moving to and who you are moving with if anyone, you are bound to have some more alone time as you set foot in your new city. It’s the name of the game y’all! For some, this may be a challenge as you may have never actually had to spend time alone and that is OKAY. Finding hobbies, new activities to try, and checking out trails and restaurants near your new home are a great way to actually enjoy being alone. In fact, one of my college professors once said that everyone must do something alone such as travel, go see a movie, or shop. Indeed, she was right!
  5. Getting lost A LOT – Going to a new city in general will involve getting lost a bit along the way. I am most definitely someone who WILL get lost and I’m not afraid to admit it! Getting lost or not knowing your way, whether it be learning a new transit system, navigating a new job, or making your way down the streets of your new town, can be scary. But, DO NOT be afraid to ask for help! In fact, not knowing your way at first will pave the way for you learning the way. It’s all about the process.
  6. Homesickness – Whether or not you felt at home in your previous home base, you will probably feel homesick and miss it once you move. Even if you were ready to leave, there will still be many aspects of your old hometown that you will miss once you’re not there. You know that one thing that was annoying at the time? Well, you may miss that, too! Sometimes, things about your old hometown that you thought you would not miss you’ll actually miss. The same concept can go for the things that you knew you would miss, as well. It is OKAY to miss things from back at your old home. The best part, though, is that when you go back to visit, they will probably be there waiting for your arrival!
  7. You will LOVE your new town! – The best part of it all?! You will fall in LOVE with your new town and you will thrive!!! Moving can be difficult and has its hardships, but at the end of the day, you will fall in love again and again with your new city and make it your own while at it. Although it may take some time to get to that point, you will and it will be great, too!

Moving can be daunting and very difficult at times, but I have seen that the rewards most definitely outweigh the risks. There is so much to be said for getting out of your comfort zone and taking a leap of faith, especially if it means moving to a brand-new city. In the end, it will ALL be worth it – just wait!

XOXO – Katie <3